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You prepare for one sorrow,
but another comes.
It is not like the weather,
you cannot brace yourself,
the unreadiness is all.
Your companion, the woman,
the friend next to you,
the child at your side,
and the dog,
we tremble for them,
we look seaward and muse
it will rain.
We shall get ready for rain;
you do not connect
the sunlight altering
the darkening oleanders
in the sea-garden,
the gold going out of the palms.
You do not connect this,
the fleck of the drizzle
on your flesh,
with the dog’s whimper,
the thunder doesn’t frighten,
the readiness is all;
what follows at your feet
is trying to tell you
the silence is all:
it is deeper than the readiness,
it is sea-deep,
earth-deep,
love-deep.

The silence
is stronger than thunder,
we are stricken dumb and deep
as the animals who never utter love
as we do, except
it becomes unutterable
and must be said,
in a whimper,
in tears,
in the drizzle that comes to our eyes
not uttering the loved thing’s name,
the silence of the dead,
the silence of the deepest buried love is
the one silence,
and whether we bear it for beast,
for child, for woman, or friend,
it is the one love, it is the same,
and it is blest
deepest by loss
it is blest, it is blest.

Magazines I Love

In a previous life called high school, I devoured music magazines – Rolling Stone, Spin, even the little-known titles I’d chance upon at the magazine bins of Maces, a long-time outlet of Book Sale items in LB.

Since then, Rolling Stone has totally gone pop, Spin literally shrank, its founder Bob Guccione, Jr. nowhere to be found in its editorial box and I began to embrace the late Liz Tilberis’ editorship of (and Fabien Baron’s creativity at) Harper’s Bazaar, not to mention Grace Coddington’s ethereal fashion editorials at American Vogue.

So it was with great pleasure that I chanced upon my first back issue of Cabinet Magazine at the same store around two years ago. Aside from the fact that the title alludes to this blog’s name and raison d’etre, Cabinet, described as a journal of arts and culture, is a pandora’s box of illustrations, photo essays, conceptual art, critical essays, etc.

This issue, titled and themed “Bones,” is devoted to all things, well, bones, with features titled as “The Museum of the Dead” and “Congenital Human Baculum Deficiency” (on the generative bone of Genesis 2: 21-23). (You get the point.) It has regular thematical columns such as “Colors” (in this issue, mauve is the featured color), “A Minor History of” (in this issue, Odd Sympathy – go figure), “Ingestion” and “Inventory.” Like the literary journal The Paris Review, it has its own perforated bookmark, except that in place of a quote, it would have a wise-ass topic. A postcard could also be detached from the magazine as well, with its own topic, of course (and equally wise-ass).

Let me put it this way: Cabinet combines my love of the most obscure, most useless trivia, the language of academia and brilliant, yet clear (possibly at times impossible), writing. It may be highbrow to some, but for me it is the most entertaining but still thought-provoking journal I have ever encountered.

Let me, yet again, put it this way: I loved the magazine so much that I immediately looked at their official site to see if they took in interns. Yes, I was willing to fly to Brooklyn just to do manual work for them.

In a word, Cabinet Magazine resurrected my passion (and I am unabashed in using this term) for magazines and being in the magazine industry (not in this country, methinks).

I thought nothing could trump Cabinet until I saw this one:

Yes, Lola Virginia, I came across this magazine at – you guessed it – Maces. Just this afternoon, so the high of discovering it is still present. Gastronomica could well be the food counterpart of Cabinet. It shares most of the format content of Cabinet, but with a marked difference in terms of the variety of topics. The pieces in Gastronomica are a far stretch more familiar to readers. There would be a lesser likelihood that an essay on the food habits of 15th century ex-convicts in England would appear here. Then again, there is one piece in this issue on the the fate of three dinners in the Titanic. Hope you get the picture.

Magazines like Cabinet and Gastronomica are the reason why I continue to read, take pictures, make collages and research on subjects which have absolutely no function in the present moment. Their very presence in the magazine bins of Maces – in between O and Allure – never fail to elicit a leap in my heart.

www.cabinetmagazine.org
www.gastronomica.org

How do you solve a problem like “Julie and Julia?”

I am currently reading (rather belatedly) “The World is Flat” by Thomas Friedman off my cousin Ate Mildred’s bookshelf.  This comes in the heels of plodding through “Julie and Julia” by Julie Powell, a book of memoirs based on her blog “The Julie/Julia Project” in which she cooks her way through “Mastering the Art of French Cooking” by Julia Child.

Those who have seen “Julie and Julia” and fell in love (yet once again) by Nora Ephron and how she transforms any script or story into delightful snowballs of magic and comfort food will thus wonder why the book feels like an endless train wreck.  In the language of ”American Beauty,” it plodded on like that breathless white plastic bag caught on by a mini-wind whorl.  You are transfixed by the very gumption of an ordinary office worker taking on Julia Child’s cookbook, only to realize towards the middle of it that it has reached its apex. Then you scratch that thought and revise the assessment – it’ll only reach this much.

And this, my friends, is the difference between a blog and a memoir based on a blog.  The blog stays where it is – in the digital universe.  The memoir still requires a story arc, capisce?

(Next post, in which Pilar does come around to discussing “The World is Flat,” but has to relegate it to bedside reading because she has to go back to reading that footnote-ridden book “The Promise of the Foreign” by Vince Rafael, a historian who, according to her friend B, seems to pluck forthcoming books from his voluminous footnotes.)

The Beginning Story

Yesterday, I was finaly able to watch “Mr. Magorium’s Wonder Emporium” in its entirety.  At the onset, the sight of magical toys was enough for me to declare it a potential Christmas movie.  (How come they don’t show “The Sound of Music” anymore?  And why was there no tv movie listing for “It’s a Wonderful Life”?)

I realized, however, that its true charm and joy lies in the bewilderment of Mary Mahoney as she realizes that she neither needed no magic wooden block nor the presence of a Mr. Magorium in her life.  More importantly, the ending of Mr. Magorium’s life (and the movie’s as well) is the beginning of her story.

The idea of the continuing story is at the heart of one of my revered books, “If on a winter’s night a traveler” by Italo Calvino, in which the story ends with the Reader having to decide between two inevitable endings – death or marriage.  The Reader (a he, by the way) chose marriage.  This only happens because the physical book has to end some time, but the message is clear – the story continues somewhere else.  It has to, if our life had to depend on it.

Thus having laid the foundational anecdotes to introduce this maiden post in my new home, I say goodbye to the old Bananaducky, faithful friend and refuge for six years, and in with the new Cabinet Curiosities.

About the name.  Sarah (the designer of this blog) and I were throwing around various names.  She aimed for positivity and a fresh start, while I wanted to evoke the (as a friend once aptly put it) many compartments of me. Finally, I threw the phrase “cabinet of curiosities,” an idea that can be traced to the Renaissance period, to refer to “encyclopedic collections of types of objects” (sorry, the source is Wikipedia, but it’s quite handy).  Today, the suggestion of a “cabinet of curiosities” has a quaint appeal, with collections ranging from the nostalgic to the bizaare, collections generally echoing the slew of objects, children and orphans of capitalism and commodification (if we want to go towards that direction). 

There is something soothing to be derived from suggestions of such mammoth collections.  I come from a family who has yet to receive the antidote for keeping things.  And by keeping things, I mean my writing notebook from Grade 2; the quilted wallet my mother sewed that has seen better days; notes hastily scribbled and thrown at the addressee’s direction during 2nd year high school.  A good friend recently remarked that, in particular, Los Banos families and Los Banos houses are fortunate in that department, in that they have the square meters and the fortitude not to succumb to their feigned inner Martha Stewarts and conduct a proper garage sale.  Or bring themselves to building a bonfire and just burn the bejesus out of every last piece of objects.

Oh no, not in our house. For as long as there is space left, and for as long as the water from the leaking roof will not catch up with them, each and every object will have a place in our home.

It is this sense of hopeless ‘archivism’ (for we want to romaticize it, n’est-ce pas?) and the breathless, fathomless reserves of our memories, the many lives we lead (not merely by roles, but plain lives), which I hope would fuel Cabinet Curiosities.

Thus prompts the next question – what happened to ‘of’?  This, unfortunately, was out of circumstance.  cabinetofcuriosities.wordpress.com was unavailable.  But cabinetcuriosities.wordpress.com was. Then, I suggested to Sarah that the URL stays cabinetcuriosities while the name to be found in the blog would include the preposition.  Wisely, Sarah pointed out the wisdom behind the phrase with the missing preposition.  I reread it and was convinced of its charm. Readers who know the history of the phrase can, at first, be disappointed, contemplate questions of typographical errors.  Others can begin to imagine what examples there are of cabinet curiosities.  What kind of cabinet is it?  How big or small is it?  Is it antique or one of those Ethan Allen creations?  Do Ikea cabinets require  installation, and if yes, how long would it take until I reluctantly call up the first male in my phonebook and surrender the parts, tools and manual to him?

Name of blog, check.  Next order of concern – the look of the blog.

Sarah wanted something minimalist (yes, yes a too-abused term) for me, something in black and white, perhaps?  (Yes, she was also the first to admit that this was her ‘thing’ right now.  I might as well go along with it.)  I toyed with the idea of Edward Gorey, the Gothic illustrator and artist.  Together, we Googled for images of his illustrations as inspiration.  I found one picture, depicting a girl in the midst of tumbling down a flight of stairs.  Beneath it, the caption reads “A is for Amy who fell down the stairs.”  “Sarah!”  I gushed.  “This is just too coincidental!”  She immediately cautioned me, “But Ma’am, it’s so negative.  You, falling down a flight of stairs?”

Nix Edward Gorey.

She reassured me that she will try her best to capture the charm of Gorey’s black and white minus the dark humor.  Dark humor does not bode well with what should be a celebratory beginning.

When I finally saw the upside-down flower bed bordering the top of the blog, my heart sang.  It was more than I expected. I immediately thought of that Marcel Proust quote about friends being the gardeners of our soul. Yes, there are more details which need tweaking. But what you find right now in Cabinet Curiosities is pretty much the bedrock of the blog. Blog design, check.

About the name.  I thought that if and when my fiction gets published, my nom de plume is Pilar Basas.  Now, Pilar Basas was a real person, my mother’s older sister.  She was a math major who belonged to a family who was fortunate enough to have had a mother who thought that there is more to the lives of girls than preparing them for a life of marriage and having babies, that sending them to school is but the right thing to do.  (Note: On the street where they lived, only two households sent their girl children to school.) 

Having a long-winded name, “Pilar Basas” evokes simplicity and fangs. I’ve always thought that if I ever adopt a daughter, I’d name her Pilar.

Name of writer, check.

As I wrote in my swan song to Bananaducky, one thing that I promise to myself and my readers is that I will never, ever, address posts to one person ever again.  Which only means that what I will write about in this blog are topics of possible interest to as many people as possible, written with my point of view and short attention span flavoring them.

And promise: more pictures.  As soon as get used to the intricacies of WordPress.

This for now. Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year!

testing

hullo, world!

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